The vigil I keep
When I cannot sleep
Is sad.
The harvest I reap,
The tears that I weep,
So mad!
And yet in they seep,
Ideas so deep!
I’m glad!
—
This is a Lai for
dVerse.
The first few I wrote had an awkward rhythm. I was about to pass on this form, but glad I kept trying!
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I love your title and your lai!
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The first two lines really set the mood for your words. Great title!
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Good write. Describes a lot of my nights! You might want to correct spelling of reap, however.
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Thank you, will edit.
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I like your first attempt. It speaks to me when I can’t sleep. Thanks for joining our poetry form challenge.
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It is good when those ideas come.
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I think you have a little lai gem here. Yes the form can be trite but with the right combination it can create a good poem to read.
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